Origin of the species: No point in sugar-coating it - right now, professional wrestling is a big, black stain in the entertainment business. The recent Chris Benoit family tragedy and the steroid scandal that has followed it have brought the industry unprecedented negative publicity, as mud is being slung from all directions and everyone wants someone to blame. As a result, WWE's ratings are plummeting, and all of a sudden it's become a cardinal sin to be a wrestling fan. What happened to wrestling being fun, harmless entertainment? Unfortunately, as it stands now, there are many shattered myths of the business that can never be repaired. Even so, it's important to remember what's good

about wrestling and the positive impact it's had on the entertainment world.

This is where I come in. See, while music is clearly my #1 passion, pro wrestling sits at a not-too-distant #2. My philosophy is that if you're going to have a personal interest, be into it all the way - no half-stepping here! And while the popularity of both wrestling and the music I love has waxed and waned over the years, I've remained vigilant (even during the dark days of Doink the Clown and Aldo Montoya). It hasn't always been easy, but that's what I do. That's why I've been commissioned to do a feature on the Rock & Wrestling Connection. It was a term originally coined in the early 80s during WWE's cross-promoting ventures with musical acts on MTV (particularly with CYNDI LAUPER - see below). In this case, however, it applies to the phenomenon of rock acts past and present who shamelessly proclaim their love for sports-entertainment and, in many cases, step into the ring themselves. But like any civilized title bout, there are rules. Here are some guidelines for inclusion:

1. Musical acts paid to make one-time-only guest appearances at wrestling events don't count. Yes, ALICE COOPER may have been in the corner of Jake "The Snake" Roberts at Wrestlemania III, but that doesn't constitute an actual wrestling connection.

2. We're also disregarding well-known artists whose songs have been used as wrestlers' entrance themes, legally or otherwise. As a general rule, big promotions like the WWE either write their own theme music or pay hefty licensing fees to use popular songs. However, in the indie promotions that can slip under the radar, and in Mexican lucha libre promotions like AAA where copyright laws differ greatly, it's a whole other ballgame. One of the best examples is The Sandman, who fittingly enough used to use "Enter Sandman" by METALLICA as his theme. Too bad he's in the WWE now, because there's no way in hell they'd pay for that…

3. If a wrestler is directly involved, the music in question has to be ROCK. Apologies to wrestling rappers such as John Cena, Konnan and Ron "The Truth" Killings.

4. Also, the wrestler has to be a REAL musician and not just act like one in the ring. Additional apologies to fake rock and rollers Van Hammer, Man Mountain Rock and the Honky Tonk Man.

5. Lastly, we are only including music produced independently of the wrestling promotions themselves. Besides, Hulk Hogan and his WRESTLING BOOT BAND ooze so much cheddar that they've warranted their own feature (click here). And hell, maybe someday we'll do one on the "WWE Originals" album, because the world needs to know of the horror that is Rikishi's "Put A Little Ass On It".

Before we begin, here are some honorable mentions that didn't quite make the cut:

CYNDI LAUPER: I'm sure there are plenty of folks that are ready to lynch me for not putting her in the list. And no, it can't be overstated how beneficial Ms. Lauper's WWE affiliation in the early 80s was for both parties. Following the appearance of manager Captain Lou Albano in her "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" video, she made several appearances in the corner of female wrestling star Wendi Richter in a feud against Albano and WWE Women's champ the Fabulous Moolah. Then there's the video for her contribution to "The Goonies" soundtrack, "(The Goonies R) Good Enough". It was a 15 minute… um… epic with all sorts of ring personalities like "Rowdy" Roddy Piper, the Iron

Sheik, Nikolai Volkoff and plenty others (you can watch it here, but be warned… it's painful!). She was omitted here for two reasons: one, she's gone on record since as being ashamed of her wrestling past; and two, she doesn't exactly ROCK, does she? Well, maybe...

KISS: The following is yet another shining example of why the self-proclaimed "hottest band in the world" has absolutely no shame whatsoever. In the late 90s, the band's reunion apparently wasn't earning them enough money, so they joined forces with WCW and allowed them to make a "KISS wrestler" with Gene Simmons' get-up and call him "The Demon". There were actually two KISS Demons in WCW: one was veteran wrestler Brian "Crush" Adams (R.I.P), and the second was Dale Torborg who, after KISS withdrew their affiliation with WCW, was given the gimmick of another musical act, in this case the INSANE CLOWN POSSE (again, see below). To be fair, KISS did grace WCW Monday Nitro

with their presence by performing "God of Thunder" live, but since they didn't actively participate in their own gimmick, they are completely disqualified from our list. Besides, does KISS really need any more strokes to their ego?

THE LUCHAGORS:This is the punk band fronted by ex-WWE Diva Amy "Lita" Dumas. From the sound (and look) of things, one can assume a fair amount of MISFITS influence is in play here. Though they show promise thus far, they're still a very new band that has yet to record a full album or secure a record deal, hence why they've been left off the list. In the meantime, check 'em out at myspace.com/theluchagors13.

Now, without further ado, the Top 10 Body Slammers:

10. NEUROTICA: After the demise of Florida jazz death metal band ATHEIST, frontman Kelly Schaefer rebounded with a new band, NEUROTICA, and made a few albums in the 90s with little success. It wasn't until 2002 when they jumped on the nü-metal bandwagon that they got their big break and, subsequently, their wrestling connection. They have the distinction of being the first and only band signed to WWE's Smackdown Records, one of many failed attempts on the part of Vince McMahon to branch out into other forms of entertainment, alongside the World Bodybuilding Federation and his laughingstock of a football league, the XFL. Why they're #10: Truthfully, they're here

out of pity more than anything. Both Schaefer and the WWE had to have known that they were attempting to capitalize on an already dying fad, because despite WWE's best efforts to cram this album down wrestling fans' throats (like they do with all their crossover ventures), it just went nowhere. At least both parties took it as a learning experience, because Smackdown Records shut its doors for good and Schaefer reunited ATHEIST. Recommended buy: ATHEIST - "Piece of Time", 1989.

9. THE SMACKDOWN: Hailing from Sweden and taking their name from one of WWE's brands, THE SMACKDOWN plays some obnoxious grindcore with a generous sprinkling of wrestling themes and imagery. Song titles like "My Entrance Looked Better When It Had Firecrackers", "Irwin R. Never Changed the World", "Job Squad" and "Re-awaiting Scott Hall" could only be thought up or appreciated by diehard wrestling smart marks. Why they're #9: When a band makes a Rock & Wrestling connection, it's generally for attention: either they want to get attention from wrestling fans, or they want to bring attention to the wrestling industry. In the case of THE SMACKDOWN, their vocals are so

incomprehensible and their music is so raw that they're going to have a very hard time accomplishing either. Like any grindcore band, these guys have a very limited audience… though from the looks of things, they wouldn't have it any other way. Recommended buy: "Someone Has to Kill the Headwriter", 2006.

8. STUCK MOJO: In the late 90s, STUCK MOJO were known as the proud Southern rap rockers, and WCW was the proud Southern "rasslin'" promotion, so it was only logical that the two parties would eventually team up. The video for their song "Rising" takes place in the middle of a WCW ring, where fan favorite Diamond Dallas Page waged war against the evil Raven and his Flock. To further cement the connection, the belt on the album cover is the old WCW United States title, which DDP held at the time. Why they're #8: Among other so-called rap-rock bands, STUCK MOJO was the real deal: a real rapper paired with some pretty solid rock riffs. From a Rock & Wrestling standpoint however, they've been

overshadowed by guitarist Rich Ward's other band, FOZZY. Recommended buy: "Rising", 1998.

7. SUPLECS: One of the most notable bands named after a wrestling move (apart from Canadian metalheads PILE DRIVER that is), SUPLECS is a NOLA trio that plays some kick-ass stoner rock in the vein of KYUSS. Their album covers feature liberal amounts of wrestling imagery, though their stripped-down riffs are far more reminiscent of backyard brawls and high school gymnasium shows than pay-per-view capacity crowds. Their latest album, "Powtin' on the Outside, Pawty on the Inside" was produced by Pepper Keenan of COC, whom they're currently touring with alongside CROWBAR and ALABAMA THUNDERPUSSY. Sounds like that's one not to miss! Why they're #7: Apart from the

band's name and album covers, there's no other tangible wrestling connection. They're proud fans of the biz, but their songs and lyrics appear to be 100% wrestling-free. Still, for fans of the aforementioned bands, SUPLECS is most definitely worth checking out. Recommended buy: "Sad Songs… Better Days", 2002.

6. FOZZY: During the filming of the aforementioned STUCK MOJO video, guitarist Rich Ward met Chris Jericho, who wrestled for WCW at the time and who happens to be a bona fide metalhead. To make a long story short, the two hit it off and decided to start a side project. Originally called FOZZY OSBOURNE, they shortened the name and released a self-titled album of metal covers. They even had cool band names and a cool gimmick: apparently they were stuck in Japan for the last 20 years due to a bad record deal, and the covers were actually their own songs that were stolen from them! While these covers paled in comparison to the originals, Jericho's charisma and voice made him a surprisingly

capable frontman. Their next album, "Happenstance", featured a handful of original songs that were far better than their covers and promised exciting things to come. Why they're #6: Sadly, they couldn't follow through with that promise. Their most recent album, "All that Remains", is a steaming turd that sounds hastily thrown together, with a rap-core sound that's totally contrary to the songs they were covering. It's also a far too serious album, with both their gimmicks and their hair taken out of the equation. Hopefully their next outing has more thought put behind it, because since Jericho is retired from wrestling and hasn't been successful at anything since, he has a lot more time on his hands. Recommended buy: "Happenstance", 2002.

5. MOTÖRHEAD: The connection: Yeah, I know we said that if a band just loans out their songs that we weren't going to include them, but this is a special case. It's not that Lemmy and the boys are necessarily fans of wrestling, it's who in wrestling is a huge fan of them: in this case "The Game" Triple H. His love for the band is borderline unhealthy - he's even gone as far as to sport the signature Lemmy chops on many an occasion. And since he's married to the daughter of his boss Vince McMahon, he's got some money and power to play with. As a result, MOTORHEAD has written and recorded no fewer than three of his entrance themes: "The Game", "Line in the Sand" (the theme for Triple H's

Evolution faction) and "King of Kings". Why they're #5: Despite contributing more theme songs for a single wrestler than any other band and performing live at two separate Wrestlemanias (17 and 21), they don't have any wrestling connection otherwise. Plus, it's not like the three songs they've recorded for Triple H are on the same par as classic MOTORHEAD jams like "Bomber", "Stay Clean", "Jailbait" or "Killed by Death". Recommended buy: "Ace of Spades", 1980 (though the aforementioned "The Game" is a bonus track on the album "Hammered", 2002).

4. ICP: I know my fellow Peacedogman writers can't be too thrilled about the mention of ICP on this site, but you can't mention the Rock & Wrestling Connection without these guys coming up. Growing up in Metro Detroit, the duo of Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope were a rite of passage - they just couldn't be avoided. With their dark, graphic lyrics, they appealed to metal kids in the area almost as much as rap fans even before crossing over into rap-rock territory. One of the big things that helped them gain attention worldwide was their obsession with wrestling. It started with their "Stranglemania" videos, which were collections of hardcore Japanese wrestling overdubbed with their own

hilarious commentary. After that, they stepped in the ring themselves, not only in all the big companies (WWE, WCW and ECW) but in their own promotion, Juggalo Championshit Wrestling (no, that's not a typo). In 2006, they sponsored the first ever house show for upstart promotion TNA i n (where else?) Detroit. Why they're #4: While they may have earned the respect of the wrestling world, let's not let J and Shaggs off the hook so easily - they were voted Worst Band in History by Blender magazine after all. Originally, ICP was a Detroit-only phenomenon, and one of the big reasons why they attracted so many Michiganders was their inside jokes and references, like their love for generic soda brand Faygo. When they went worldwide, nobody else really got the joke. We also have to take into account the "rock" aspect of the Rock & Wrestling Connection, because ICP has always been at their core a rap act, though their rhymes were, as the kids say, "wack". For those who grew up during that scene, though, ICP can still be good for some occasional chuckles. Recommended buy: "Riddle Box", 1995.

3. THE MISFITS: Say what you will about the post-Danzig MISFITS, but there's one thing you can't take away from them - they keep themselves busy. In the late 90s, veteran wrestler Vampiro was in a WCW faction called the Dark Carnival led by ICP. After ICP pulled out of the company, Vampiro hooked up with Jerry Only and the boys, started donning the Crimson Ghost face paint, and had a bunch of tag team matches with Only as his partner that, unlike his ICP matches, didn't suck. Why they're #3: There aren't really too many references to be found on the in-ring career of Jerry Only, and that's a shame because he was actually a pretty damn good wrestler. Obviously he's kept himself

in tip-top physical shape over the years, but I had the opportunity to see an old Jerry/Vampiro tag match recently, and was impressed with his top-rope antics and bump-taking abilities. True story: hardcore legend Mick Foley recounts in his book "Foley is Good" how Only, a big time Foley fan, presented him with a bunch of autographed MISFITS CDs and memorabilia. Of course Foley, who prides himself on having the worst music taste in the wrestling biz, had no idea who the hell THE MISFITS were. Recommended buy: "Collection 1", 1988.

2. BUMP 'N UGLIES: Another Detroit phenomenon, the name BUMP-N-UGLIES refers to both a hell-raising punk band and an active tag team in the local indie circuit. BNU the band, though currently on indefinite hiatus, was an active force in the underground Detroit rock scene before releasing "So Powerful…So Beautiful" in 2003 on the appropriately named Steel Cage record label. BNU the tag team, which is actually one-half of BNU the band (Bubba Mackenzie and Josh Movado), are currently the tag champs of D-Town promotion Independent Wrestling Revolution (IWR). Why they're #2: With song titles like "It Ain't Cheatin' (if the Ref Ain't Lookin')", "(Theme from a)

Chairshot" and "Heavy Hearts and Cauliflower Ears", their music is clearly directed towards the unabashed smart marks, but the songs are so witty and catchy that they can easily win over non-wrestling fans as well. Add in some of the most ridiculous lucha libre costumes ever made, and you've got a recipe for fun! Check out Bubba Mackenzie's official MySpace page rightcheer. Recommended buy: "So Powerful…So Beautiful", 2003.

1. THE DICTATORS: While most of the Rock & Wrestling connections listed above were much more obvious, NYC's DICTATORS have 'em all beat for one good reason: they were first. Frontman Handsome Dick Manitoba, a former wrestler himself, exuded all the qualities you could ask for in a wrestling superstar: machismo, attitude and, of course, charisma. Today's wrestling fans would be shocked at the intro of "Two Tub Man", where Handsome Dick challenges grapplers of the day like Verne Gagne and Dick the Bruiser. Let me rephrase that so it can sink in for the marks: he's cutting a promo - on a rock record - in 1975!! Then we have the eponymous hero of "Borneo Jimmy" who likes "standing by

the ringside, cheering on the bad guys", and of course there's the jovial patriotic anthem "I Stand Tall", which is the perfect soundtrack for putting commies in headlocks! Now while the vast majority of their catalog dealt more with partying and teenage troubles than in-ring action, THE DICTATORS still made the Rock & Wrestling Connection before any other act thought to, and long before it was cool to do so. Why they're #1: Though they may be Rock & Wrestling pioneers, their influence and importance in music history lies far deeper than that. During the time when the genres we know of today as punk and metal were still in their infancy, THE DICTATORS were a band that dared to be different and, subsequently, had profound impact on both scenes. Manitoba's charm matched with the songs of Andy Shernoff and commanding guitar of Ross the Boss (later to don a loincloth in MANOWAR) created a sound that was all their own and still holds validity today. Most importantly, they're still going at it 30 years after the fact! So if your musical diet is ruled by genres, give these guys a try - they'll change your mind. Recommended buy: "Bloodbrothers", 1978.

FINAL THOUGHTS: Attempting to convert someone who abhors wrestling is kinda like trying to turn a SALIVA fan onto SARCOFAGO - both are akin to beating one's head against a barbed wire bat and then rubbing salt into the wounds. And sadly, with the Benoit incident looming over the wrestling world like a black cloud, it's tougher than ever. While us fans can't make any more sense out of that situation than the so-called experts can, we do have the good sense to realize that it is entertainment; and while the business is far from perfect, we still appreciate what those guys (and girls) do out there. Regular visitors of this site know as well as anybody how it feels to be into something so much and not have the general public "get it". Luckily, there are plenty of folks out there that do get it, so don't expect that squared circle to be packed away anytime soon. - Cardona

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