Hello, legions of rock fans. It is I, your humble Mechanic to tell you of another fine offering in the world of heavy music. This one is kinda close to my heart, a little band called ASSROCKERS. They come from a little town called Washington DC, maybe you have heard of it. My, do they ever rock your ass! This EP from a local legend is a humorous hunk of classic stoner metal. Screeching guitars, pounding rhythm section, and raunchy lyrical content. It reminds you of that mullet you had in high-school doesn't it?

"All Inputs" gives off an eighties vibe -- fun and easy, with plenty of ear-catching riffs and melodies to make it groovy. Songs like "Satan Built My Hotrod" and "Nymphomaniac" are good examples of the hard-partyin' rock gospel these boys be preachin'. The songs are great go-ahead rock-n-roll with killer riffs, and a vocalist off the beaten path. Bison Roughbottom's vocal antics are a little of an 'acquired taste', but fits their CLUTCH-like grooves like a glove. A favorite of mine is "24 Hours", a story of love and romance done ASSROCKERS style. There are two tracks on the disc that don't seem to fit here though, with the party theme and all that, maybe a shift in lyrical style more than musical content, "Et Tu Brute" dealing with "The Ides Of March", and "Thor", which, well...deals with the mythology surrounding a pagan god. I am slightly confused about this, all this partying going on and all the sudden, I am in the way-back machine or something. Don't get me wrong here folks, these are good tunes, but when a band does an about-face like this I get a little flustered. Maybe they are creating a new genre here, kinda like power-party metal or epic-sex rock or maybe even doom-cheese. Well whatever you call it, it is damn cool. Visit their site via the link below and send a loved one an "ass-o-gram" for the next gift-giving holiday. Do you think I could persuade these guys to do a split with ANAL STENCH? Well it's worth a try. Later ass-mongers.

- Murtaugh

OFFICIAL SITE: myspace.com/assrockers

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