First off, when this hit my desk, all I could think of was Speed Stick. Why not just name your band Summers Eve? Then I found out the pretentious asshole who fronts the band has the unfortunate last name of Mennen. Your parents musta hated you, bub. Now you're overcompensating for it by torturing us with your egomaniacal histronics. Simple rule about your name appearing in your band name is as follows : if no one ever heard of your previous bands, don't do it (VAN HALEN excepted). But c'mon! We all know this thanks to crappy bands like BON JOVI and DOKKEN!

Secondly, there's the Hot Topic, raver alien cover and the "alternative" looking band. They look like American raver kids from around 1997 or so. What strange pleasure awaited me? Techno? Pop punk? I couldn't tell, but I knew it wouldn't be good. And it wasn't. In fact, it wasn't even good in a "it's so bad it's good" kind of way. The minute I heard whistling in the first track I knew it was going to be a nightmare. This is like a SCORPIONS ballad on every track, even when it's trying to rock. Goddamn if everything that band did after "Love At First Sting" wasn't gawdawful crap! This makes me wanna pull out "American Heavy Metal Weekend" by the CIRCLE JERKS and crank it. And for once I won't laugh along! No, I'll be pumping my fist in the air at the demand for properly made metal!

Bottom line, this disc shoulda came coated in Speed Stick cuz it fucking stinks! It's one godawful piece of crap byyyy MENNEN! (Ha ha! Betcha thought I forgot to include that joke, didn't you!)

- Two Tub Tony

OFFICIAL SITE: www.mennen.net

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