Lemme tell you ‘bout this rock n roll reviewer racket. You listen to a whole lotta dross and hope you get one disc out of the pack to make it worth your hassle. Usually, you are not so lucky and you wind up with stacks of cee dees in every corner of your domicile. What makes it hard for me is that there are already stacks of records in every corner. So, now I’m double fucked like my name was Gauge. Regardless, it sucks. Some times I think about not doing it anymore. But, then I know how I am. I always need something to do or I get bored and then I’ll start getting into weird things like needing to buy MEN AT WORK records because I hear them all the time on the XM channel they play at work (true story). I justify this crap with logic like "Well, they're basically WIRE circa "Pink Flag" if WIRE wrote pop tunes and were from Oz instead of England." No they are not. But, it was worth the dollar I spent on them just to hear "Overkill" in the privacy of my own home again.

Anyways, it's a rough life folks. I am constantly surrounded by music. I have a small stack of cds to my right and probably at least 30 singles/eps and 10 lps behind me (not counting the couple thousand (conservative guess would be 3000) lps, 7"'s, cds, etc also back there). Just below me are probably at least 10 books on music and to my right and left are tons of videos and dvds. Do I really think I'll ever get through it all or really listen to it all? Probably not. And when I'm long gone and buried (with my beat copy of KISS "Alive!") none of it will matter because chances are it will all go to Goodwill or the Salvation Army. So, in another 20-30 years if you really need any of it or need band t shirts up the ass they will all be at one of those two locations on the northeast side. Tear it up! And while you're at it, please take all the empties in the storage room back to the store and buy the cat some catnip. She digs that shit.

Now that I've gone on about my drug, erm, record habit let's talk about this disc. It sucks. Really there isn't much more to say. It's so bad I won't use it as a coaster because I fear someone might turn it over and see what it is and I never have people over these days. This is one of those throwback bands that long for the days of Guitar Center fret histrionics and the period when synths were acceptable. We're talking some Pro Tools produced DREAM THEATER garbage. And I know some of you’s like that shit. I think it sucks wang. Let's just go thru the intros to each song : guitar noodling, synth wash, acoustic guitar noodling, techno meets prog metal synth intro, guitar noodling with synths, acoustic noodling, E-chugging, piano ala JOURNEY with epic guitar meets violins, guitar and synth washes then fret noodling.OH WAIT! We're back at the beginning. The vocalist sounds like the dude from QUEENSRYCHE. Eject, throw at wall, rinse, repeat. P.S. if you go to their website you can see what douches they are. Just click on the bio page (and them submit them to Rock N Roll Confidential’s "Hall Of Douchebags”). They actually have "Favorite Food" "Likes/Dislikes" etc. What the fuck?

- Two Tub Tony

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